I hate to be so morbid and self pitying.
I think that those of you who have been following this blog for a while know that I'm not manufacturing this. But, I'm pretty much at the bottom. I don't see any way up. I think about suicide all the time and am waiting for the right, uh, inspiration. Every morning I wake up and think "today is it" but I'm too much of a coward.
I don't know what to do with myself.
I don't know what to say.
I'm sorry everyone...