Sunday, January 18, 2009

Ray's Shiny New Year

Hey, wow, did I leave this blog hanging or what? What a bleak entry that last one was! I was on no sleep; exhausted and sure that I'd never get a peaceful night again.

Then the dreams stopped.

Literally stopped within a night or two of my having written it. I have two theories. One is that I needed the therapy of describing them to someone. (Thanks, readers, for your feedback and more importantly just being there for me to describe them to.) Or two they were holiday related. The date on that post is Dec. 28 meaning that Christmas falls right in the middle of that period of a solid week of nightmares.

But for now they've stopped for whatever reason and I'm grateful.

I've actually been feeling pretty well these last few weeks. I don't have any reason to but when can a depressive look outwardly to explain his feelings? The economy is hitting me hard. A significant portion of my income is based in a sector of US business that is really hurting so consequently my checkbook is, too. Frankly I don't know how I'm going to make it through next month.

Nevertheless I've been in the best mood since New Year's Day that I can remember for months. It might have to do with my clean desk. I ritualistically clean down my office and package up everything from the old year sometime in the first week of the new year. There's nothing quite like a clean desk and office. It's a silly little thing but there it is.

I even realized yesterday that I haven't taken SJW for days and haven't missed it.

It's all almost disconcerting!


Anonymous said...

Millions of people around the world suffer from depression and most of them don't even realize that they are experiencing depression. If you are constantly sad, dull and just streching life then get yourself checked for depression.

ativan said...

Thanks for your story. Now all we waiting for 2011 new year.

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